So um, I ‘m no longer a manager.

So after the last post Cody and I talked. We talked about what was important in our life at this moment and what changes needed to be made to make sure that we are doing the best for us, me and our family and we came to the conclusion that I always knew would be but now I actually acted upon it.

A few weeks ago, my mom got sick. She currently has a non functional kidney which is causing her to be super sick and it needs to be surgically removed. If you follow me on Facebook that you’ve known about it for awhile now.

When she got sick it made me think about what I would do without her. She not only is my rock in life she is also one for my kids. She takes care and mothers them when I work hard at being successful at work.

So when she got sick it was like a wake up call for me. Here I am, striving to be the best at work, a place that does nothing but give me stress and cause me to be a grump when I get home to my kids. What was so important about this place that I needed to be the best? Why was I choosing that over my life at home with my kids?

I had no good answers for that. None. So I took this time of reflection and ran with it. My mom getting sick was the best way for me to realize that I wont have her here forever and that she wont always be able to be my “babysitter” and that this great women, this person that I look up too and my kids look up too can’t be the person to raise me kids while I was working. She needs to be a grandmother and I, I need to be the mother. The main person, the person that hopefully my kids will look up too.

So I went into work. Told them about my mom and told them that I needed to be home. I needed change in my life and that this time was not the time for me to be selfish. That my kids will only be 5 and 11 months now and never again. This is my chance, my chance to raise them like my mom raised me.

So as of today, I am no longer a full time working mother. I am no longer a manager. I no longer will attend 3 hour meetings, stay there all hours, work overnight and no longer will be responsible for other associates needs. I will be a part time, sometimes working mom. Who only goes, does my job and leaves. Nothing else.

I will now be a mom, mother, housewife. The manager of my family and I am scared as hell.