The end of the night

Friday, March 11, 2016


The house grew quite pretty quick as all the boys were tucked in bed and sung their last song for the night. I handed off the baby to dad and stood at the kitchen sink.

I have never been the one that liked doing the dishes or even really cared for picking up the house at the end of the night. But somehow after having Andalyn I turned into a mom that couldn’t wait to accomplish all those mundane tasks.


Here I was listening to my 2 year old snore through the monitor I had placed on the counter and felt the heat hit my hands as I started to grab the dishes to clean off the food. That somehow was prepared that evening even though I had a clingy baby attached to my hip.

How’d we get here?

How was it possible that I was my mom in this moment? I don’t remember becoming her but I slowly did. Here I was in a kitchen like hers in a quite house with my kids asleep after a long day doing what she’s done.


I thought about that each time my hands hit the water. I scrubbed another dish, placed it into the dishwasher and paused just for a moment to hear my baby whimper but quickly calm in her daddy arms.

Did he think the same thing as me? Did he wonder how he became his dad so quickly and naturally?

I finished the dishes and found myself picking up toy cars and bouncy balls and helping them find their way back into their toy bins. When I finally sat down the baby fussed and was tossed back into my arms where I nursed rocked her back to sleep.


I sat there silent next to Cody who was watching basketball and thought about all the things that will need to be done the next day. But this time it was different, I wasn’t mad that I wouldn’t be getting all well-deserved me time that before I would crave. Instead I was happy at the thought of it all.

I couldn’t wait to tackle the library with all the kids in tow and was excited at the thought of them running down the dirt road as we’d take the dog on a walk. I even felt good about folding the laundry again.


These tasks although I have done them every week for a good 12 years felt new because I was doing them now, like how I remember my mom doing them.

I pictured my young kids looking at me as I gracefully pick up this toy here, throw a load of laundry in there. Laugh with me like I did when I was young with my mom as we have a dance party in the kitchen while dinner was cooking.

I accomplished a lot this week. My house has been cleaner than ever before. I even scrubbed the toilets.

The dog and kids have been out of the house more than once, I cooked food, real food. I uploaded all my pictures off my camera card and even got some ready to print. I got all the errands done and paid bills and I have a DVR filled with shows yet to be watched.

kids3kids10These tasks are my tasks now that I will only get for so long before they will become my kids tasks and their kids tasks.

There is comfort in that.

Knowing that we start off life in such a small little way and end it bigger and more important regardless if it just putting the last of the dishes in the dishwasher at the end of the night like your mom did before you.

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