Your a surprise party waiting to burst out.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

How do I feel about this second kid who is still growing inside me? I am unsure with how my emotions should be. I know that I am excited to hold him for the first time and put a face to this tiny heart beat that squished up against my belly. That I will get to count his toes on the feet that kick each time he hears his daddy. That I will get another hand to hold, another mouth to kiss, another soul to love.

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Your like a secret hidden inside that boggles my mind. Who is this baby, I know nothing about? I knew instantly everything about Wyatt before he was here. I dreamt of him and how he’d look and what he’d be like but you darling boy, are a secret.

Your a surprise party waiting to burst out. You are something I seem to know nothing about. You are shocker, a absolute wonder and I am amazed at how well you keep a secret.

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Who is this baby of mine? Are you going to be like you dad or maybe like me or are you something that no one has ever seen before.

I have one hundred and forty forty days to go before I get to meet you, which just seems to long. I don't even have name to call you yet. Most days I feel normal like there is not a another soul inside of me and then you kick, squirm or flip to remind me that you are here and then I sit and ponder you. The secret boy with no name.

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I imagine dark hair softly placed on your head and tiny toes and little fingers and little ears and just you little. I imagine what your cry will be like and how you will fit in my arms and how different it will be to actually hold something so tiny again. I imagine the way you will look at me, with big brown eyes and then I imagine you different. Maybe you'll be blonde like Wyatt and have the same eyes has him or maybe you will have red hair. Will you be bigger than he was? Will you cry be new to me? Will I instantly fall for you like I fell for Wyatt?

Oh little baby, who is such a secret I cant wait to meet you. Where all my questions will be answered and I will sit in disbelief and be completed astounded at who you are.

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